Sunday, January 11, 2015

How I Felt at Church Today: Black Vapor.

We are grateful
and we are glad.

We have been taught
and we believe
that
it will be all right
in the end.

Every tear we shed
has a trade-in value
of an endless duration
of happiness.

And
endless + endless + endless
is quite a long time
for smiling--
some of them
knowing smiles
over how silly we once were,
back when we let
black vapor expand to fill
the whole shell
of our pitiful bodies.

But.

In the end?
When is that exactly?

I am grateful
and I am glad
that it is not
necessarily
today.

Time is not yet endless.

Tears aren't shed
just to be traded in later--
they are shed
to be shed.

For now,
I may fall down
on my pitiful knees
and feel my tears
waiting just behind my eyes,
and let the glass vial
in my heart
break,
and that black vapor
slowly billow
out to my fingertips.


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