Friday, October 21, 2011


I consciously try to avoid becoming incensed.

But I was unable to do so during the following two experiences.

1. When picking the hymn at the beginning of class one day, my Doctrine & Covenants professor said, 
"Oh, the sisters in here don't know Ye Elders of Israel."

You think I don't know "Ye Elders of Israel" because I'm a girl?

Pardon me, but I know all three verses. Probably better than some of the elders in the class.

2. Last week, this reading strategies expert gave us a presentation at work.

And she said this heinous lie:

"Oh, you all don't know what telegrams are, do you?"

Are you trying to tell me I don't know what a telegram is?

Whatever happened to

"Dear Rolfe.
Don't stop!
Your Liesl."


Oh, I know what a telegram is.

But that's not even the worst of it.

It got worse.

Then she said,

"A telegram is like a tweet."


I think my brain just exploded.


I don't accept.

Not kosher.


If anything, a tweet is like a telegram. Because the telegram came first.

But it's really not.

Just a soapbox to remind the world
that hymns are hymns
and  the internet is not real life.


  1. Rachel, I enjoy your blog so much! I also try to avoid becoming incensed, but it tends to happen when (1) people are patronizing me, and (2) people try to tell me what I believe. Fun stuff. Um, no, I do not pay 15% tithing, even though you know for a FACT that I do.

    Also, for the record, my family has been known to spontaneously break out into four-part harmony singing "Ye Elders of Israel." Yes--even the girls. :) So I'm with you.

  2. I love you and your blogposts. Amen sista, amen.

  3. HAHAHAHA! Too true: the internet is not real life. "Did I tell Gus?! No! That'd be like posting it on Facebook! If I had a facebook... Or if I wanted to share intimate life details with people I'd avoid on the street..."
    Thanks you Shawn Spencer.

  4. you are the wittiest ever.
    love love love.
    serious win this one is.

  5. Haha! I love it Rachel!

    In the MTC we were about to sing "Ye Elders of Israel" in a devotional and the man conducting the meeting said, "Now, this song relates more to the sisters than you might think; the opening line states, 'Ye Elders of Israel, come join now with ME.' " I liked that insight. :)